Longing for Peace
by Evia Wingjade
Summary: When Edmund is injured on a Narnian battlefield, he realizes a desire that could make or break him. Can he find the will to live? Rated K for some thoughts that could be distressing for some people.
1. Chapter 1

Longing for Peace, Ch1

Bruised, beaten, and weary beyond belief, the young king collapsed onto the ground in a heap. There was no grace left in his muscles; he felt as though his bones turned to butter as he lay panting, desperate for release from the ache of fatigue the plagued him. The battle that felled him moved away, father into the wood where the enemy forces were laired. He'd thought the battle would be simple enough. Not easy, of course. Battles were not easy things, and not in the least because they were physically taxing. The ache of muscles was nothing to the sorrow of fallen comrades—even fallen enemies, who could have repented and been spared, pardoned of all wrong doing if only they would accept the Lion's grace and mend their ways.

King Edmund's mind wandered as he lay bleeding on the battlefield, waiting to see what would befall him next. He was too injured to move on his own, despite the feeble attempts he made. The dead, loyal Narnian and fell beast alike, lay around him, and the mud in which they lay together was more red than brown.

_I just want to rest_. He thought, sighing to himself. _Perhaps if I sleep, I will wake in Cair Paravel, and Su will grumble at me for getting injured. Perhaps I will not wake at all. Perhaps I will find that I have died and wake in Aslan's Country. I feel so mortally tired, I almost wish I could._

While he lay considering his journey to Aslan's Country, the namesake for that truest of homes walked the shoreline of Cair Paravel, making a decision that would change the fate of many worlds. He knew the longing Edmund felt for the final rest. All warriors felt that weariness at some point, and only through the combination of grace and stubborn will did those warriors continue to live past their first heart-felt call to the eternal lands.

"Not yet, my son," Aslan said aloud. "One day you will come to dwell with me for the rest of time, but not today. There is much yet for you to do. But I will comfort you a while. I will comfort you until the end of time. Only cry out to me, for I will hear you, and be near you, in any world. Be wakeful. Do not seek the final sleep today. "

And in a wood across the land of Narnia Edmund came awake, looking around for the Great Lion whose voice had called him from sleep. "Aslan?" Edmund called out, hopeful. "Aslan, I heard your voice. Are you near?" The ghost of a whisper replied, with a warm and golden breeze blowing across his face.

_I am always near._


	2. Chapter 2

Longing for Peace, Ch2

Feet—hooves, actually—picked their way carefully through the bodies of the fallen after the battle was ended. The Narnians had won the day, though the price was heavy. The fauns who searched the battlefield wept silently as they searched for survivors, passing their friends and brother in arms who lay dead in the hope of finding the living before it was too late to save any. The dryads and naiads were with them, their steps light despite their sorrow. These tree spirits had no fondness for the taste of blood, and were quietly relieved that the battle had taken place far from their roots.

"Cadmus bring a horse! Quickly! King Edmund is here, wounded," called one of the Willow-women, stooping to check for signs of life. She felt breath from the young king. "He lives! Hurry, we must care for his wounds!"

Cadmus the faun trotted over, trying to lead a skittish horse across the field to where the young king lay.

"I am trying to hurry Adelpha, but this horse is not fond of the smell of blood."

"You said you found the King, Adelpha?" called another voice from the edge of the field of bodies.

"Yes Tavin, he is here. But he is too much for me to carry with his armor."

"Then I shall carry him." Tavin replied, "Though I like the feeling of blood beneath my hooves no more than the Dumb-beast who will not walk this field."

"You are a good Horse," Adelpha replied with gratitude, "I'm sure their Majesties will honor your willingness to put aside your pride."

"That's all very well. Just see if you can get him out of the mud. Oh, Cadmus, call some others and help lift the king! Adelpha is only one dryad."

"Yes, Eris and Eryx are coming. We three can manage him, if fair Adelpha will hold the king's head."

"Well thought, good Faun. You few must put him across my back face down, I think, and walk one on each side of me, so he does not slide off."

"Yes, that seems best. On three now; one, two, three!"

"_aagh—ah—agh_"


	3. Chapter 3

Longing for Peace, Ch3

"Your majesty, are you awake?"

"I'm afraid so. Where am I, and who are you?" Edmund replied hazily through pain and exhaustion.

"I am Adelpha. You are surrounded by loyal Narnians, good King, and we will see to your hurts."

"I am glad to hear it. But why do I seem to be upside down?"

"I was afraid you would fall off if we tried to sit you up, Your Majesty," replied another voice, which Edmund knew at once to be a Talking Horse.

"For certain you know more of riding than I, noble Horse. But I'm afraid I cannot see you to greet you."

"I am Tavin, Your Majesty. And you can see me; or at least my flank."

"My deepest thanks, friend Tavin," Edmund replied, and would have continued, but the dryad shushed him.

"Your Majesty should conserve your strength. This will not be a pleasant ride, I think. I will do what I can for you, but that is precious little until we can remove your armor."

"I understand. I will try to rest, then, and be a better patient than before now. I have just one question, and one request."

"What does Your Majesty required?" Asked the faun Eryx.

"I would be grateful for water," Edmund replied, and it was provided, carefully, with one faun to hold his head and other to pour water in his mouth a few drops at a time.

"And your question, Your Majesty?" inquired Eris.

"Where is my brother?"


	4. Chapter 4

Longing for Peace, Ch4

Peter rode at speed across the valley, warned by the King Above All Kings that he would be wanted in the wood were a contingent of the army had expected to find battle that morning. Peter had entrusted the head of the army to his brother, for his recently mended arm was not yet up to hefting sword and shield in battle. Susan and Lucy had prevailed upon his good sense—and his doctor—that he not led the army today. _I cannot even be angry with them, for they were right._ He thought as he pelted along, as fast as he had the heart to drive his horse. Across the open grass, in as straight a course as one could ride, Peter galloped toward his brother.

Across the distance, Peter saw a strange sight; it looked like a horse with fauns to each side holding it up. Peter diverted his course, wondering that any horse that could not walk on his own would be driven, rather than carried in a cart. Perhaps he was dazed, but not terribly injured? As he drew closer, Peter understood the truth—it was not the horse that was steadied by the fauns, but a person draped across the horse's back.

"Ho, Narnians! How fairs the army?" He called out to them.

"Hail, Lord King!" called a faun from the party. "The battle is won. The King Edmund is here, and asked for you not ten minutes ago."

They came together then, and Peter threw himself from his mount to see Edmund, hanging from the back of a Horse, white as chalk.

"Edmund? Ed, can you hear me?" Peter asked, gently cradling his brother's head.

"Peter?" Edmund whispered groggily, raising his head a bare centimeter. "I thought you were at home. At Cair."

"I was. I came to find you."

"Oh." Edmund's eyelids fluttered, and he went limp again. Peter just kept himself from crying out in dismay.

"His Majesty needs care and rest, my King," a Willow-woman said, gently sliding her hands under Peter's and feeling the younger king's face and neck. "I believe he will mend, but he should not tax himself."

"Of course," Peter replied, tearing his eyes from Edmund's face to speak to the dryad. "Thank you."


	5. Chapter 5

Longing for Peace, Ch5

The journey to Cair Paravel was long and exhausting for the little party. They rode in near silence, dragging their heels and hooves through the gate nearly an hour after Peter met them. Thanks to the warning, though, the castle infirmary was prepared, and the doctor waited in the courtyard to take charge of Edmund. Peter stopped long enough to order food and lodgings for his subjects who had born his brother home before following his sisters to the infirmary.

"… has lost much blood, but he will live, so long as we stave off infection. If you would excuse me, I believe an infusion of yarrow would be just the thing—ah, Poppy, ahead of me already, Thank you."

The doctor turned from his queens to clean Edmund's wounds. The young women rushed to support Peter into a chair, just as he realized that he had pushed himself too hard in trying to reach his brother.

"Oh Peter," Susan began to chide, but Lucy cut her off.

"You can take the chair next to Edmund's bed, Peter," Lucy offered, steering her eldest brother into the seat. "And I'll bring you some tea."

"Thanks Lu." He replied, wearily. "I know Su, I'm sorry." He offered her a tired smile. "I shall learn, some day."

"Well, what can I say to that?" She relented, kissing his cheek. "I'm just thankful you are both home."

Lucy wrapped Peter's hand around a mug of warm liquid then produced a second cup for Susan. "I think I'll go see how our visitors are doing," she said, scooping up the teapot and drifting from the room, leaving Peter and Susan to hold the vigil for their wounded brother.

The hall leading from the infirmary was quiet, though Lucy expected nothing else when one of the four monarchs was badly wounded. She ghosted through the corridors to the dining room where she found three Fauns, a Dryad, and a Horse around a table. The Fauns and Dryad were happy to accept her offering of tea; the Horse thanked her sincerely, but said he felt more like water just now. Four of the five were dining on bread, cheese, and wine (the horse had hay, oats, and water). Lucy went to the kitchen to see the cook about something more substantial, to find that Mrs Beaver, who had come to stay for a week or so, was frying fish and baking potatoes. So Lucy selected fruit to take to the diners with her own hands, and thanked them for seeing her brothers home, and promised them a meal as soon as it could be made ready.


	6. Chapter 6

Longing for Peace, Ch6

Edmund opened his eyes and found himself in the dark. Or so he thought at first. He realized slowly that there someone sitting between him and the lamp, turned so low that it was barely lite. "Hello?" he whispered.

"Ed?" Peter's voice replied, and the person next to him shifted. The light turned up so he could see Susan at the foot of his bed, and Peter beside him.

"Well," Edmund began, but he coughed. When he tried to speak again, he was quieted by Susan, while Peter handed him water, then tea flavored with herbs and honey.

"Better?" Peter asked him, once he'd drunk half the cup.

"Much." He replied. "Still tired, though," Edmund's eye fought to stay open until Susan told him,

"Rest, we'll be here when you wake."

Dawn had come when he opened his eyes again. He tried to sit up but found this a painful idea, and stayed resting against the pillows at his back.

"Ah, Your Majesty is awake!" A naiad exclaimed quietly, coming to him. "Their Majesties your brother and sisters were awake most of the night, Sire."

"Then we should let them rest. I suppose there is medicine I must take and bandages to be changed?"

"Indeed Sire. I'll fetch the doctor in a moment. Would you like tea?"

"Please. And breakfast?" the young king asked hopefully. The naiad laughed her tinkling laugh, so like water over river stones.

"I shall ask the doctor." She left the room, trailing the sweet and salt smell of the sea mixed with fresh water.

Edmund gazed at his brother and sisters, who slept around his bed in chairs. The sound of heavy footsteps drew is eyes to the door, where someone longed for but unexpected paced through the threshold.

"Aslan," Edmund breathed, trying to move to greet the Great Lion.

"Be still my son," He replied and came to Edmund, to stand next to his sick bed and allow himself to be clutched by the young king.

"I dreamed of you, when I was injured in the woods," Edmund murmured, keeping his hands in the warm fur of his Lord.

"You did not dream." The Lion replied. "I spoke to you. I came to Cair Paravel while you were close to death on the battlefield and sent your brother to you."

"Thank you Aslan." He answered his eyes on the great paws.

"You have a question for me, Son of Adam."

"Is it wrong to want to die, Aslan?"

"Why would you want to die, Child?"

"I don't. That is, I don't any more. But when I was lying on the battlefield, I was so tired, and hurt so much, I just wanted to leave the pain and be with you."

"And what of your brother and sisters, who sit beside your bed in the night, watching over you?" He asked his voice solemn. "What of the people of Narnia who love and respect you? Would you leave them?"

"If it meant I could be with you, I think I might." Edmund replied, feeling small and selfish.

"Oh my son. I am with you. You do not need to die, or even be near to death, to call out to me and feel my answer. It is only when you despair that you listen for my voice."

Edmund's eyebrows drew down, and he replied, "I have not been listening lately, have I, Aslan."

"I hear your heart all the same. Do not be sorrowful, my son. Your heart longs for my kingdom as it longs for Me, and that is no ill wish. But do not open that door yourself. I will open it for you, and call you to me when your time has come. Until that day, when your heart yearns for the peace of my country, be still and call me. Cry out to me and I will answer. It may not be in the way you expect, but have faith that I will always hear you when you call. I will always be found when you seek me."

"Thank you Aslan." The great Lion looked into his eyes and he beheld there love, such that he could not describe. And a great peace washed over him, with the warm breath of the Lion, and he slept.

When Edmund woke, the sun was high in the sky and the Doctor was mixing herbs at a counter across the long room.

"Good afternoon," Edmund called to him, and the old dwarf jumped.

"Afternoon, afternoon Your Majesty. I was beginning to wonder how long you would sleep!"

"Why, how long have I slept?"

"It's been a day and half again since the nurse Delphine said you spoke to her."

"So long? I had no idea. Where are Peter and Susan and Lucy?"

"Ah, their Majesties agreed to go to bed early this morning. Now let me check these bandages. They were changed while you slept of course, but…by the Lion's Mane. Your biggest cut is almost healed!"

Edmund tried to sit up and found to his pleasure that he could. "Has Queen Lucy given me her tonic?" He asked, surprised.

"No, no." The doctor replied. "King Peter said that as long as you were to mend naturally, she must let nature do the work. It certainly has been working quickly today!"

Edmund relaxed against his pillows once more, accepting the tonic the doctor offered him with a smile and a word of thanks. He knew that his healing was a gift, as his life was a gift. While he knew he would be sore, that too would serve as a reminder. Edmund tried to think of how best to tell his siblings of his conversation with Aslan, but decided as he settled back to sleep that if they needed to know, Aslan would let him know when the time was right.


End file.
